23th-Life Goes On.

Today. 29/12/2011
Tomorrow. 30/12/2011
It would be our 3rd month if everything is different from now.
But everything just opposing my wish.

30/11/2011
She came and tried to destroy us, I was too scared and I cry.
Yet, I had to make my assignment done.
Life Goes On.

6/12/2011
Such a sudden, you told me that you just want to be friend. I gave you time to think. Although I very scared.
Yet, I had to attend class as usual.
Life Goes On.

14/12/2011
I was waiting you to clarify everything to me. It was hard to me.
Yet, I had to do presentation.
Life Goes On.

21/12/2011
You told me, what you have said is what I should accept. I really upset.
Yet, I had to do my revision for final exam.
Life Goes On.

27/12/2011
I asked you something. You responded with 'it is not good'. I felt the pain.
Yet, I had to sit for the final exam.
Life Goes On.

But you know? How hard to do so when you are emotionally disturbed, but still you have to pretend strong, pretend that 'I'm fine' in order to make other things done? How much I hope I can leave everything and in a secret place, without people disturbing, without task, without phone. So that I can actually heal my scars alone. But I know, no way I can do so. *sigh.

21th day

Just back from first paper of final exam.
This is the 2nd sem final examination.
This is how it feels.

I do not really experience the feeling of having final exam in UTAR.
The last time I had exam was the time we are almost there.
Every day have your call with me after I finish each paper and back to home.
I have Ricola from you with me during exam.
Even during the half an hour before entering to exam hall, my mind was filled with your shadow.

You entered my life.
You leave my life.

running out leaving scars--Jar of Heart

Today.
Without you.
I experience how the exact feel of Final Exam.

*多宁愿只是争吵，还能道歉和好

19th Day

Yesterday I saw Kenneth's father and chatted with him. We chatted about you.

He called me and asked, "where is your handsome?"

I answered quietly, "he isn't mine."

He told me one thing. About a month ago, he sent you back and brought you to have lunch. He asked you, "you so handsome, do you have girlfriend already?"

You answered yes. He asked who, does he know that girl, from where.

You told everything. You told him, "my girlfriend is aiying."

How sweet. How sad. How pity.

Should we? Shouldn't we?

Everyone has only once that they meet the one who they feel that is the one he/she is going to marry. May be some does, some doesn't. How about you?

I read my diary a few pages and I read one sentence. I wrote there:

"he said:"I think she is the one to marry." <3 "

Do you still remember this? I beg you remember.

Merry Christmas. I pray to God to bless you and us this morning. Take care.

17th Day

Just now, my UTAR friend who studies graphic design uploaded all the photos that she had captured during MASISWA circuit at Melaka.

One of my friend tagged me. Notification pops out. I clicked into that particular notification saying XXX tagged 3 photos of you.

Then, 1st photos appeared on the screen is our photo. My heart beats. That photo is nice.

You are tagged as well.

I know you were online also, I bet you saw it too... What did you think that time?

I miss you. =')

The 16th day

This is the 16th day I lost you.

I just realized how much I imitated you unconsciously.

After I laugh only I realized the way I laugh same as you.

The way you respond people's question when they asked why.

For example, people ask 'why the weather is so warm?' Then, you will say 'because it's not cold'

'Why am I so hungry?' Again, you will answer 'because you are not full'

This is you. And I realized, whenever I heard someone answer this kinda questions, I will tend to answer them as the way you are. I just imitated you unconsciously.

One more. Do not know why my mom suddenly like to say the word 'noob'.

This 2 days she keeps on saying this word.

You used to say I'm noob. You always like to say me 'noob'.

Whenever I do not know something, you just said 'noob'. It's been how long I did not hear you say the word 'noob' to me?

I just can't forget any thing of us. How long I need to put all these down?

I do not know. But I sure, not for now...

I should

It's been a few days I stay heartless.
I only feel my heart when you called me.
Other than that, I feel body without the soul.

I should have started to let go.
I just don't want.

It isn't an over.

I love songs. Especially some of the lyrics.

[The One That Got Away]
-I should have told you what you meant to me, cause now I pay the price
-In another life, I would be your girl, I would make you stay.
-Talk about our future like we had a clue, never plan that one day, I'd be losing you.
-Time to face the music, I'm no longer your muse.
-SO THAT I WON'T HAVE TO SAY YOU WERE THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY

[Rolling in the deep]
-We could have it all.

[Someone like you]
-It isn't an over.
-I beg I remember you say: some time it lasts in love, but some time it hurts instead.

[Take A Chance]
-I know you know that's something here, that you cannot get past the fear, I can help you make it clear
-When you feel like trying again, reach out take my hand
-See how great it could be to fall in love with someone you can trust
-WHO WILL NEVER GIVE UP, CAUSE YOU ARE ALL THAT SHE NEEDS.

[Wish You Were Here]
-What I do to have you here?
-I can be tough, can be strong, but with you is not like that at all.
-I remember all the crazy things you said.
-All the crazy thing we did.
-And the truth is that I REALLY MISS

You did not reply my messages. You did not answer my call
But whenever I decide to let go, you called me. Only when I talk to you, I smiled.
People says, when you smile even no one sees it, then you really mean it.

I really do not want to let go.
I know how hard for me to believe a person all over again.

If I really lose you, I...

People who have their own idea

Yesterday was on my skype with friends discussing the time table registration. One of my friend felt curios why I am at home as I should have presentation on Wednesday.

He reminded me of the presentation.

That is the worst presentation I ever had. For the first, and I will make it for the last!

That case was like this:

Because I have gone home last Friday, so I had to go back PJ for presentation on Wednesday at 2pm. I PURPOSELY went back to PJ on Tuesday night and left PJ on Wednesday straight after my presentation. I did not bring along my laptop.

I asked my group mate to tell me any thing they discuss on facebook.

Alright, our 'group leader' told us that he will done the slide and written assignment at Wednesday 12am.

As I know I will have 4 hours break on Wednesday, so I thought I manage to prepare it within the 4 hours.

But then, on Wednesday, the 'group leader' only start on the slide around 12pm I guess? He only sent us the slide and written assignment through facebook AT 1.35PM

I damn angry seriously!

*He changed all the points that we have done for few weeks until late night.

*He did not tell us about how much he has changed the thing.

*He sent us the slide for half an hour earlier than presentation, who can present the 'new idea'(as it has been changed a lot) with the preparation in 25 minutes?

*He even late for the presentation.The part that he should present was just left there for us. We totally no idea about what he wanted to talk on that part!

*Even when I enter the class, I saw the lecturer was so angry! Saying us late!

*He left his house from Sunway at 1.40pm I guess, during the peak hour sure jam! He is late!

He totally changed the things that we have done for him but he did not tell us what he had changed. I know he knows the topic in his finger tips! But how about us? Everyone of us do not know what we presented! What the rubbish presentation?

One more thing I damn hate is that, he even msg us that the lecturer likes his presentation! HIS PRESENTATION! He did all mistakes but appear to be our own false, but yet he owns the praise! Is that fair enough? HIS PRESENTATION was great, then what were us? A flower or a 'mistake machine' to show how great he has done?!

People who have their own idea is hard to cooperate with. Because they have their idea what will happen in their imagination, they were closed into certain view point which is they cannot accept others' opinion if it is slightly different. Even is just SLIGHTLY different.

Conclusion: I will never be in the same group with him any more although he is good in knowledge but group assignment really needs team work. NOT INDIVIDUAL! The score is directly affect our result. 4/5 need to maintain 3.5 cGPA and above. Please.

If there is a If

If there is a if, I will be a mature girl.

If there is a if, I know how to love you.

If everything come over again,

I will tell you what I have not said.

I will tell you the 3 words that I have not told you orally.

If you come back to me,

I bet we can be much better than the past us.

If there is a if, I sure we can go further.

IF

I remember that you like my smile.

I do not know how I feel now...

What's going on? Can anyone tell me?

Yes or No? Clear or Blur? I do not know.

It seems like no but yet it is blur.

It's clear that it definitely not yes.

I feel blank.

I feel heartless.

I feel nothing.

I feel hurt.

But I feel no tears.

How heartbroken is it?

I do not know.

Or may be it's not?

I don't know.

Yes, I don't know.

You always say I don't know any thing.

This time is different. I need you to clarify for me.

I should have told you what you meant to me.--[The one that got away]

But I never told you, what I should have said.--[I never told you]

As for now, I only know one thing.

I miss you.

Boy

How are you today? Boy?
Don't always go for tea and playing badminton until late night ya.
Final Exam is around the corner, remember to start your revision...

The sticky I have not finished yet, it's inside the fridge of my house here. I'm going to finished it up soon. You said 'I know you like to eat sweets'. So, I will wait for sweet ya...

Where is the shirt I gave you? Does it with you or at Kampar house? You promised to give me shirts with your name, I have not got yet. Thus, I will wait for it as well ya~

I want to buy a present for us. But I do not know what to buy...

Well, promised not to do what I warn you before ya...
Take care there. Drink more water
Love you. =)

One more

One more thing I hope for so long and you said you would give me.
You have not done yet!
You can't just leave like that!

You said you want to buy hush puppies shirts in the same colour and wear it when we go out!
You said you want me to lose weight and you will wear a nice shirt and I will wear a flower-pattern dress and go hanging around.

A chance for both of us

What goes wrong? Such a sudden?
I will give you sometime to calm down. We are just so in love. Why suddenly have this kinda idea?

I have promised myself, I won't cry easily any more since that stupid incident. I swear. I know it hurts you when you heard I cry.

Don't you be that selfish. You can't dump me aside just because you scare of hurt when you know I cry. I promised not to be hurt easily by anyone including you because I believe you will protect me. I believe.....

We have to face our problem together, isn't it? How can you just leave me alone, leave yourself alone when something happen which only will be solved among both of us together?

I have never be that happy since the day I asked that 'possible?'. Yes! Never! You gave me happiness which I could never had until I found you. So do you think I can be happy without you?

That stupid incident was not your problem. Why are you running away? You have stolen my heart, please take good care of it. I'm heartless here. I'm heartless without you because you stole it.

How do we all expect no hurt when we are in love? Don't forget. Cupid released arrow as well. Somehow it will hurt people who in love.
Even Rose has thorn.

We can be more tough in this relationship after all. Can't we? I believe in it.

We have not been to beach.
We have not been spending each other's birthday together.
I have not met your mother yet altought I was almost there.
I have not told me father what's your name yet.
I have not cooked a meal for you yet.
You have not brought me to eat Japanese food as I have brought you to Korean cuisine.
You have not held me in hand while introducing to people that I'm yours.
We have not even step into 100 days.

Last chance. Again, POSSIBLE?

My cute him

I was busy colouring my assignment 2 in front of Hotel Pearl International. Then my phone rang. I did not know who was that at first but he is my boy.

I answered with who are you.

Then he kept on asking can we be friend. I asked who are you but he did not want to tell.

Some more he asked me whether do I have boyfriend. I guess is he, but I was not sure.

I answered that I have boyfriend. He acted do not know and said "my friend said you do not have boyfriend, who is your boyfriend?" I knew who is this guy~

Again I asked, who are you?!

He finally said, I know him. (I helped him to clip his fringe at Melaka for tournament) He said, you helped me to clip my hair. Then I know he is my boy.

Sorry dear, your sound slightly differen from usual. I was first thinking is you, but you talked about those funny things, that's why I did not sure.

Happy~ =P

My cute him < 3

This is the one. =)

A stupid incident on 30/11/2011

A stupid incident happened during my 2nd month anniversary with him. 30/11/2011It's really stupid!

I DO NOT LIKE it.

And PLEASE, do not try to destroy your ex-boyfriend's on-going-relationship. Please go away if you have ever dumped him. You do not deserve to have him anymore. The on-going-girlfriend will definitely take good care of him! He will live better than the time with you, and live even much better than without you.

I will take good care of my boyfriend.

*I will not be that weak any more, will not cry easily any more. I do not want you to upset because of my weak.

I will be STRONG. =)

Lubb you~

Oops...

In accident, my friend tag me a song. 'Cry' form Rihana.

I listen to it. I opened another tab. I saw the bday boy's album. His bday. I saw their photos. Yea. Is "THEIR" photo. I was not there, that's why I am not in the album.

Suddenly I can feel my tear. It feels like the last time about my past. And my roommate is beside me, I don't wanna cry.

"Girl with the broken heart."__Cry from Rihana.

Yea. I am. Yea. I will stay strong. ='(

What the hell!

Why things that I don't really like keep on happening? I try to stand strong, please don't ever shoot me, I will fall seriously.

Today should be my best day. It was. But ended up? Like 'what the f**k'

Today we handed in our assignment 1 and studio journal as well as show our lecturer the assignment 2 progress. Why I say it was good day for me? Because my critical lecturer praised me! She did! I was not dreaming! 1st time for almost the sem 2. I'm so happy! She said 'Ai Ying, well done this time.' OMG! I almost feel like jumping up and down and up and down. I straight away call my mom~ =D It should be my best day ever! IT SHOULD

Another happy thing was, my friend said he is lazy to drive, and leave it to me! What made me excited was, his car is new! 2 weeks new! MyVi 1.5! And it's auto car! 1st time I drive auto car. Not bad. *ps: I even drive better than he does. =P

What turn me down? I don't feel like suitable to say it this way. I wanna sound it out but not to offend anyone. Today is one of my friends' birthday. We planned to give him a little surprise. I drove, bring them to buy cake and try to hide it from the bday boy. After all, we were having lunch happily. Suddenly, I have to go. So, that cake which I took them to buy, I do not tasted it, I don't even know what was it.

They started to comment on the bday boy's status in Facebook. I jumped in and mentioned that I missed that cake. But no one seems like care about me. They all are in their own world. That 'world' definitely happened after I leave. They all just ignored it.

I hate to be ignored. I really hate. *ps: Sociology term_out group. As I am typing these things here, I think am I too sensitive? In fact, yes. I know. I am too sensitive. But can't blame it on me. I have a terrible memory for my friendship. And it follows me forever! That's why I so sensitive about it. Sorry~ I shouldn't.

Again, I will try to stay strong.

What to do now? Just to think the positive thing. Like:

leaving to Melaka (although I do not have form to play tournament at all)

they believe me and let me play single (ONLY, I want double too =( )

lecturer praised me

can skip classes (but I have assignmentsss like hill to be done within 2 weeks)

Alright. Think positively girl. And also, I miss my boy~ =/

The Unfair World

So many bad news is being told to me. And all of it really unfair!

Feel like wanna mention here, but do not want to offend any one.

SO?

I swallow it myself.

THEN?

Stay strong.

I have known the world is never fair.

I should have accepted this long time ago.

But plenty of it happen to me, please forgive me if I couldn't accept it these in short.

I will try to stay strong, I will try my best on everything I gonna do. NOPE! I will DO my BEST on everything. I will try to accept what is unfair to me. I will try not to so care about something or someone that who doesn't really belong to me.

Any way.

Nothing can be done right now.

Except for,

MY ASSIGNMENT

Off to start my assignment.

bye~

Still, it hurts

I have not been meeting you since a long time. I had a look into your profile. I saw something that I could never be pleased.

I saw you all wall post. She misses you, you miss her. But why not me? My tear drops as I scroll down to your profile. That used to be mine. I... I...

I really miss you. ='(

I really do not hope our relationship would go this bad. Do you know? It really hurts me a lot.

I...

What you all having now, was used to be mine. But now? None of the part of it I owned.

It seems like, I put all my love, relationship as well as my heart on a tray, and it's just given to you all like that. I left with heartless. I left with memory. I left with the memory that hurts me a lot to company me.

May be I should thank you? As you taught me how to be strong. You taught me not to believe in friendship but you do.

I never thought that, friendship can break like what happened in love.

I never thought that, the hurt that given by friendship is far more worse than what love can give.

I never thought that, the hurt that given by friendship is far more last long than love can.

I thought that, we will last long. But...

Looking at your picture, my tear just unable to stop

What a special 11/11/2011

Today is totally awesome day of me. It's more awesome that I had these things in 11/11/2011...

Today my Academic English have to hand in 1st draft of assignment. Then follow by those tutorials which I had no time to complete it last night. Follow by the Effective Communication Skill mid-term test. And finally my public speaking presentation. And the time was so damn pack. 9-11am, two continuous tutorial class which really need us to complete the tutorial questions. 11.15-12.15pm is the test already. The Academic English assignment have to hand in before 3.30pm and my presentation start at 2.30pm.

How do you feel? I know I have remove the stonessss from my back!

Public Speaking? How? Hmm... I think, still okay, not bad. =)

Any way, I have gone through my terrible 11/11/2011 on Friday of Week 8. Bye week 8!

Tomorrow replacement class, after that, Ipoh! I will be right back! Wait for me! =D



It's a special day. And I have got his message this early morning at 12.30am. Love too...

This is taken before my war starts.

And I did not sleep well for the past 5 days.

So, please ignore the dark circle there,

I know it's obvious. >.<

Lazy Girl

When is my last post? I forgot. :P

Quite busy actually. since end of September

29-03/10/2011__Have had tournament at Sarawak, Swinburne University. I represent UTAR for my very 1st time. And yet, we got 1st runner up. (We lost to MMU Melaka team)

It's when I started my relationship with him. 30/09/2011_7.30am

Then of course after skipping class, have to catch up a bit, so I was busy doing my practical, tutorial, study and etc. Whole week gone.

14-16/10/2011_Have had UM invitation tournament. This? Unfortunately we have just quarter-finalist. However, I have got so many nice memory with him as well.

After 3 weeks, I have gone home. A lot of things happened. As well as I have had my very 1st date with him which only two of us but no others. We went for Korean cuisine. He likes it a lot. Then we went to walk around. It was a sweet one =)

Let's move on, my 3rd tournament in UTAR.

30/10/2011_Clash of Utarian. It's actually Klang Valley Campuses (inclusive of Petaling Jaya, Setapak and Sungai Long) vs Kampar campus. Well. Our team won in badminton, but the overall champion is Kampar.

*This day is excatly 1 month anniversary for him and me. It will be perfect if the 'coach' let him to play this CoU. But he just be rejected for representing Kampar campus, so, he can't come and that passed our 1st month anniversary.

But it's ok. A quote from him. 'We still have many '1 month', t

hen after that, we still have many '1 year' =)

I found that, my teammates for UTAR badminton are so good and so nice. The elder 'brother' always tells me that they are just like a family. Yes! It is! We are just like a big family with different attitude. We are the best team ever! I love you guys!

And again. Assignments start! ECS(effective communication skill), Marketing, Academic English and Sociology. Every time when I start assignment which I have to sit in front of laptop and browse internet, my shoulder definitely pain! Just as what happen to me right here, right now. Even when you read this as well. PAIN! Can you please leave me? =(

Today early in the morning, I and my friends went to Taman Jaya to draw. It's soft pastel colour scenery drawing. We went to a garden. That is a nice garden which I have noticed them since the 1st time I take LRT from my housing area. I have drawn a nice one, one of my female friend, she has drawn a MASTER PIECE! Damn nice, but yet, she doesn't really satisfied with it. As for me, seriously, not as perfect as hers, but it is my 1st ever nice drawing with COLOUR. (Because every time my colouring skill will spoil my piece of drawing) :P

I still have one more piece of drawing which is glass bottles with colour pencils. I have no glass bottles with me right here, so I have to wait until I get home.

Assignment for Analytical Drawing starts next week. OMG! D:

Keep it up! Don't give up! Do not forget to STUDY for next week sociology and ECS test!

That's all~ bye all.

This is taken at Taman Jaya garden. Public toilet

Be mature my girl~

Sometimes. I just too young. I do not know how to think in the mature way.

Just now, I wanted to post on his wall and asked him to do the same as well. I want our wall with those so-called 'sweet' things. Such as 'I miss you', '< 3', 'I love you' or something like that. I did ask him to put in a relationship on Facebook as well. May be... In fact, yes. This kinda things is just for those who cannot think in mature way.

He said he does not want this to be so fast, so rush~ He said wait until we are stable 1st. Yea... I understand... Fine. I will change. Kay? May be, we don't need that, right?

I Love You.

My besties.

Today I went to Jusco, Ipoh. With my friend, Wee Nee and another besties, Joanne.

Joanne, it's been a year we seldom meet. No. It's been a year we didn't really meet each other. Thanks for coming out with me today.

Happy to chat with you. I really miss those days. Going outstation for tournament. Unfortunately I can't have the best memories with you this year for my last-year official tournament. How good if you were with me for tournament, my memories will be super perfect.

Any how, I'm happy to have you as one of my besties.

I found that the way I tell something is damn interesting. I can make my friends laugh when I was having 'story telling'... LOL...
Wee Nee, Joanne, I knew 2 of you were happy listen to me, isn't it? =)

No way to describe my feeling

I promised not to find you but wait you to do so... I promised. But it's quite hard for me. I know sometimes we need our own time to do some other things. I understand. But I just... (I dk)

Today was the 1st time ever I found that your phone is off when I sent you a msg. I feel weird. You usually do not off your phone. W.H.Y.?

It's ok. I can stand it. I understand what a 'couple' is.

Love is just a bonus. It's not every thing.

It's just a bonus.
I must adapt to it. I have to adapt but no other way...

Ai Ying, be stong ya... =/

The sweet things.

Since that day, I have get used to chat with you at least once before a day ends. Every day, I will look at my phone, wait for your call, but not message (you don't like to sms).

I found that the sweet thing when I chat with you through phone calls is, listen to your laugh. Do not know why, whenever I heard you laugh at the other end of the phone, I feel happy, satisfied. May be is because I know you are happy, so I'm happy as well? Or, is because I think that, guys only will laugh happily regardless of the way they laugh when they are truly happy with their friends or, the beloved one.

Is it true? Blek...

Another thing is, I like to call you early in the morning at 8am perhaps. It's 'early' as for you. So, whenever I call you, you will answer my phone with your lazy sound. I feel sweet too. But... I'm not simply call you to wake you up. I call you because you want me to wake you up. You know what? This is the 1st guy ever who asks me to wake him up.

It's a sweet thing! LOL

Well. That's all for this time. I come up to update my blog just because I wanna have my touch with the keyboard. I have a false appearance that I am PRO when I can type fast... LOL

Good night. Sweet dream~

'Don't care me'

You said 'never mind'. Okay. But still you act differently.
That day you said 'don't care me.' Just now you said 'don't care me'

Do you know how it feels like? Before this I said once. Don't you remember? May be you have forgotten. I feel scare.

It's weird? Perhaps. Okay. Let time to solve it.

That message that saying you want me, I still have it in my phone. You want me. Is it?

Y.
Don't like this. Two days. I didn't hear bao bei or lao po something like that.
Yesterday we didn't chat on phone.

Since that day we had our last meet, we did have chat every day. And every time at least half an hour. Without it now, it is more weird.

You said never mind. But you did mind. Sorry. I promise not to do so any more.
I miss you a lot. Miss that 'you'. Not this 'you'

Sorry my dear

SORRY...

I don't mean to do so. Last night... This morning, 12.30am I still didn't get your call, I thought you have gone to bed. You should cause you are having exam this morning. 9am.

When I on my phone just now, 7.00am, your call reached. I can hear you worried about me whole night. You sound a bit unhappy. Sorry dear. When the call ended, I got 3 messages and total 100 missed call. OMG! I know how much you worried about me as I did.

I shouldn't had off my phone. Sorry for making you so worry. I promise, no next, kay?

Y.

I enjoy this moment. Every day will receive your call at least twice. Asking me what am I doing? How I did in exam? You said so many sweet things. You said you will be happy if I happy, you miss me. Wey... You!!! I'm talking to you. Same here. I miss you too...

Well... I have decided to go Kampar next Thursday. Just to meet you, kay? You remember to clean your room and tidy up ya... :P

Seriously, I'm bored with the profile picture, and I'm waiting for our photo to be uploaded. I should have taken our photo by using my own camera, so we will not be waiting here. Nehmind. Patient. Hopefully can get it as soon as possible. Or else, I ask my friend to take for us next Thursday when we meet up ya... Cannot say I force you although I'm really forcing you! LOL

That's all for today. Off to my revision for Mathematics For Social Science. All the best!

What's a wonderful September

Tournament is done. I have got 1st runner up in 'parent & child' mix double. *although I was not partner with my dad.

Then, suddenly, our relationship goes well. Extremely well, within a week. I wonder why? XD

These few days I really miss you. I can't even focus to do my revision as this week I'm having exam. Seriously, when I read the text book, 2 or 3 lines, maximum 1 paragraph, my heart flied to you. Luckily I have done majority of the revision before this. Otherwise, sem 4 will be waving hand to me(copy paste from facebook).

These few days we chat on phone. I remeber, Sunday we chat until 4am. 2 and a half hour... OMG! 1st time ever! It breaks my record... LOL.

We talked so much. What you like to eat, what are you thinking, what do you feel about me, what do you feel it's romantic, where you hope to go, what you dislike and etc... =)

I'm just too happy. LOL. Thank you. Especially last night's call. You said so many things that you dare not to say. Alright alright. Time passes faster please. After my exam over as well as yours, then only... okay?

I know you like I smile~ This photo for you, blek... Miss you

Kinda nervous

Last night was my war with all foundation art stream student! It was kinda nervous before the war start.(the environment created by my friend perhaps) Oops. I haven't explained what was going on last nigh, okay. Yesterday 19/8/2011, 9pm was the moment we, foundation in art student, register for our next time time table.

It can be said as the war! If we wanna same class with our gang of friends, we would sit together and discuss what class or what time or what lecture and tutorial group. After that would come out with 1 or 2 or 3 pieces of time table which we planned. Then excatly at 9pm, registration will be opened for us, then? All will try to login, yea, try!

Before 8pm, my gang of friends already on their skype to discuss. Gosh. I was having my dinner, suddenly a call was made to me asking me to on my skype. Every body talking, discussing. * Sweat... They created a nervous environment. They even had count down for 9pm!

Luckily my roommate is science stream student, she have done it the night before my registration. She helped me to login. I guess I was the 1st among our gang to enter the page.

Then? I have done but some of my friend still trying to login. Yea. I helped him. I registered for him. By the time, some of the classes have fully-filled. After that he managed to change on his own.

While, one of my friend too, he managed to get all the same but except for one. Now still hoping there is someone change the class group, then he is able to take the place. Hoping, Praying, Wishing.

Luckily, most of us got our 1st plan. Well, I can name this as my 'final sem assignment'. We have started to plan 1 week ago. Then last night was my 'presentation'(to register). LOL

This is campus life.(perhaps)

I got it~

Last night I sent him a msg asking him to call me after he finish coaching, no matter how late is it.

I offline quite early last night, because my shoulder pain and don't feel like wanna online as he was not online. I waited.

By 11pm. I did received ur call. Unfortunately, it lasted for 29 second when it lost connection suddenly. I waited your call back, but no.

So I believe you might call me again, I purposely did not off my phone. I went to sleep. I went to sleep while waiting ur second call with dissapointment.

I fell asleep. By 12.30am. Yea! My phone rang. But without ur contact picha. It wasn't ur phone number. Well, I just picked up.

WEY~ Yea! I know it was you! I was satisfied this time. A short chat, we both went to sleep. Again, slept with smile... =)

*sigh

Right before I start the title of this post, I sigh. I worry ='(

It seems like everything is changing. I dw! Sorry! Really sorry if I have made you misunderstand that day. I don't bother him. Who is he? I DON'T CARE! What I care is you!

Yesterday I missed your call. Such a waste! I called back but you were busy. You know? The last time we chatted on phone was on 9/8/2011 exclude yesterday! I told you do call me last night but you didn't! I purposely on my phone. I purposely turned off the silent mode. I waited whole night. This morning, what I did the first was looking at my phone. My phone just blank.

I so worry now. Can we just be like last time? Every day Facebook just to wait for your thumbnail to be in green dot. Every time I take up my phone just to see whether or not have your msg or call.

Missing someone can be a nice thing.

But for this moment, I know, I'm missing you badly.

Uhhhh...

Yeah baby! I have done my assignment 2 as well! Just to print out the Design Rationale, then finished! Oh... My shoulder starts pain. ..... PAIN! My back feel tired too... Better go and rest.

I just cleaned my room yesterday, and now seems like I have to clean again... So many rubbish. But, I think, later. After a nap may be... shoulder damn pain... ><

Lazy song... where are you? It suit my mood right now...

Oh ya! My 'breakfast' which taken at 1pm is maggie mee... Wow... I have not eaten maggie since I started my 'campus' life here. What's a delicious meal... Well... I prefer Mi Sedap. Gonna buy it soon.

That's all... I need a rest seriously... Good 'night'

I knew must be something.

Finally, I have got ur reply. No wonder you say like that. I purposely do so. I want to see whether will you get angry or not. It does.

Sorry sha lao.

I write that just to prove, I don't miss him any more but you. I miss you. Well... I will be the one waiting again.

It's been a long time I have never cry for love. This is.

But then why u keep on saying 'don't know'? I wonder why I am such a fail every time? =/

Don't tell me that 'I scare I will hurt you', it means nothing actually!

What am I suppose to do after you say that? Nothing but keep on what is happening.

And I hope, I won't hear 'I don't want to hurt you' from you. Don't ever tell me this. As for this moment, I want nobody but you.

What is going on??

Last night, I didn't receive ur call. I went to sleep after a msg for u. Asking you whether you were busying or not. Well. You just reply. Not called. I saw the msg this morning.

So, I wait for your call or whatsoever. Chatbox I did send u a msg in this morning. But surprisingly, I got no reply! Even you online!

Well, I wanna know what's happening. I guess your friend is using ur laptop. I sent you a msg half an hour ago while I still can see your thumbnails with gree dot at Facebook. Again. No REPLY!

I started to feel like, LOVE is kinda thing that very difficult to hold! Exspecially for the people who lack of sense of security like me, I scare!
No replies! No call! No chatbox pop up!
I do miss you! =''(

What's a busy week 11

It's already week 11 I have been studying here. So fast! And this week is kind of busy! Monday night went for badminton, I went at 8pm and back at 11.30pm. So after bathing, time to sleep.

Then come to Tuesday night. I went to cook in my friend's house. When I'm back, started my English Presentation. It's Radio Play which means we had role playing as a DJ. It was great!
Our group did it well! And I recorded it! Then only I realized that my sound quite 'girl' or 'feminine'.

Then Wednesday, I had to prepare my presentation for today. Sociology Presentation. My group was doing the issue of deviant. 2 example of deviant were binge drinking and HOMOSEXUALITY! OMG! Homosexuality is one of my friend's favourite. He has been looking into it for quite some time. And before presentation start, I had already known that he was going to ask many question.

Well. My presentation today is done. Done quite okay I think. I managed to present my part 'perfectly'? And I can answer some of the questions too. =) feel great!

I like my formal look today. Black blouse with lace and black skirt. Nice!
Today I had my maths test 3. How was it? I managed to get all the answer correctly I GUESS.

Tomorrow, one more test to go. English test. No problem I THINK. But some how, have to take a look at it.

Well. Story doesn't end here. I have much more thing to do in this weekend! I have to rush my design practical and assignment 2! GOSH! I will be having no sleep on this coming weekend... T.T

So... What should I do next after this blogging? (I'm sleepy) I will take a look at my english as revision, then... SLEEP! *gay lou, I miss you ya~

Miss You =)

I was sleeping when you called me last night 11pm. When I heard the ring, I woke up quickly. Hoping that it was you as we had not chatted for whole day. Oh, yeah! It was you. I smiled and picked up the phone. You knew I was sleeping, just a few minutes of chat, you asked me to sleep. I was having my smile with me when I went back to bed.

This morning. I sent you a msg at 10 sumthing perhaps? I have been waiting but I can't get your reply. I was doing my homework until 2pm. I felt hungry. When I was about to eat, you called me. You have just waken up. You talked with your lazy sound. So cute :P Like kids. I like it. Yea. Believe me, I like it~

Well, after 10 minutes of chat, lost connection... It's ok. It's more than enough.

BTW, you have made me miss you. I want to see you =')

Possible ♥

Chan Ai Ying! Is it too fast...? Perhaps. I asked last night, yea, I admit, it was too sudden. But just now, I asked again. But then by that time, my internet connection was lagging. So I can only see the answer when I back from Hailam with my friends. I worried that would be a negative answer.

But then, first time I ever have a 'yes' for answer!
You know what? It is the first in my list! Yeah! I love it~

Possible.
< 3

Bored

After I have done the sociology revision, I find I'm bored. Nothing to do. Even facebook also like half dead. Well. Come up here. Think for 10 mintues but still do not know what to share. Then read the previous posts. Oh yea~ I can upload photos of my art work. Yeah... Here we go.

First of all... Line expression.

Happysadanger

confuse

Then, texture.

physical texture. (got tissue paper, tower, plastic bag, paper, knit and keypad cover)

Aiyoo... Simply draw. Whatever. Damn ugly~

Value. Taylor Switf

Colour wheel

Colour pixel. Adui! 15 hours I spent!

Space-My favourite room. You know what! Part of my dream house... LOL

I'm just busy

You know what? I was too busy for past few weeks since I'm back from Penang. Busy with my pratical, assignment.

For that practical, I used total of 14 hours to finsih it. And for that weekend, I was so busy until I don't even have time to turn on my computer and log in to Facebook. *sweat

Assignment? Actually I have done it, just lazy to print it out. But then I wonder, so-called assignment, only need us to write 2 'essay' for not more than 200 words. At first, I thought, it's too easy. However, I found it's too hard to squeeze my 400 words into 200... And this is called assignment... Alright~~~~

One more thing, my shoulder damn pain these few days. I applied something. I pasted salongpas. Still pain. Exspecially after sitting a long time with the same pose...

Well, suddenly, I don't feel like wanna celebrate my birthday. It always ended up with bad things or unlucky day. Last year being punished to stand outside the class. Previous year also seem like I had a bad day. This year? I just said I wanna celebrate, but so many bad things happen together to me... >< My 'gor gor' promised to celebrate it with me, but then he told he he has to work. I have no mood already. Fine! Let it!

I understand.

I received your msg.
At 1st, I was pleased.
Finally you remembered me.
But my replies are short.

Then, I asked.
You want me or not?

your reply:
We just be friend, can?

Okay.
I understand.

You didn't betray her.
You love her.
And I envy her.

Msg just received.
I do not want to read.
I don't want your consolation.
It's tear bomb.

However,
the msg.
I read.
I don't want!
I dw ur tear bomb to me!
You dw me, you are not qualified to bother my feeling whether I'm happy or SAD! < / 3

'busy' again

Whenever I text you, you will say you are busying. BTW you will also put =( and say miss me.
Which is real?

Actually,
In my deep heart, I know the answer.
I feel hard waiting for your msg.

I shouldn't have wishful thinking.

You and her,
Long distance love perhaps,
still,
having 3 years of relationship.

I think,
Both of you can go longer, right?
No body knows the answer,
God, you know?

Then who am I?
Passer-by <>

the third one

How can a guy loves two girls?

Before this, I hate those be the 3rd person intefere in others' relationship.

But now I realize,

It's not easy to be the third person.

I will never close with those guys when I knew that they have girlfriend.

So that he won't fall in love with me,

And same goes to me.

This time,

You are the one love me at the first,

then I started to have feel with you

But then, it's hurt.

I cried.

I dk why.

I miss you.

You said you love her more.

Me? You love also.

You know my feeling?

What can I do?

3 years, are you willing to let go?

3 years, not easy

3 years, I have never thought of that

and you have it

you appreciate it too...

You are so greedy.

Both of us you want too

She doesn't know about this.

But I feel hard for this. =(

What can I do?

Can any one teach me?

My last official tournament--Inter team

It's been a long time I didn't renew my blog. Just back from Penang for Inter team. What's a bad result. Closely to enter quaterfinal. Lost to Sabah team 6-5. Sabah lost to Penang with score 10-1. We lost to penang with score 7-4. As usual, we have to go back once we lost our game. That's why I'm here to update my blog. That day after we lost to Sabah, we had a meeting. I could see every players with sad faces. The situation there was so down. We were close to win. We were.

Besides the main part of Inter team, I met Sabah's sir--Sir Yapp and handsome under 18 player-- Bear bear. Sir Yapp is kinda funny. He likes to laugh and makes jokes. Bear bear, basically, I have no comment with him. After our team lost to Sabah, we were going to play with Penang team that night, I have no mood at all. And he gave me support. Yea... Remember the msg u sent me to gimme power? I like it actually. And the way you 'transfer' power to me is kinda special. I like it too. You held tight. :P

My babe, Tze Ai. Today she purposely came to meet me at B' Suite Hotel (the best ever hotel, I bet every players have to same opinion as what I do). She gave me a shirt with her name in purple colour. I really appreciate it! Thanks babe. Thanks for da meet, da shirt and da friendship. Felt like dw to say goodbye when you said you got to go. I felt sad seeing ur back going further and further until lost in my eye sight. Babe, I miss you! We will be meeting in future! I swear babe! I wanna chat with eu! <3

My 'younger brother' (He dw to let others know our relationship, so I can't mention his name here) I like him very much. Sincerely I will regret if I didn't ask you for being my 'younger brother'. I went to his room last night. At 1st, he didn't talk much as his friends were around. Until I felt bored, I wanted to leave. As his room near the lift, he said I can't simply open the door, and he went near me. Both of us chatted beside the door. We chatted nicely and quietly. I like it! I have never aspect will have this kinda conversation with eu. And too, I like the way you look at me. As what I said, you are cute. I like you just the way you are. Miss you. Sayang you. <3

Another 'younger brother'--Wen Hao. He asked me to be his 'sister' before we went to Penang. He is kinda shy guy, but much more better than before. He dare not chat with me. But nevermind, I will make you dare to do so in future. May be we can hang out in KL. Kay? Dear bro? I hope can chat with you more... =)

A‘younger sister’—Cheah Lin. She gave me a present. 99 stars. Girl. Don’t worry, I appreciate it. You can call me ‘jie’. And, I will treat you as ‘mei’. I will try my best. =)

Previous ‘younger sister’--Sin pei. The last time we were in B’ Suite, we had a lot of best memories. 1st time she slept with me, she gave me 721 of paper folded in heart shape. Both of us miss it too much. Unfortunately, our team played in different time, so we had lack of time to meet and chat nicely. We were just sms in the whole trip.

Almost come to an end. As this tournament as my last official tournament, I took a lot of picha with Ying Ying, Kah Mun and Kah Yan. Nice memories but with bad result of tournament. Filled with happiness or sadness. No comment. O.O

I really scared.

Just a little incident happened. But I don't know why I was so scare. But may be I have not experienced before... Therefore, just scare. But quite touch with you guys protecting me in such way. I appreciate it a lot, seriously.

Today someone took my picha secretly... >< I don't like people do that to me as I feel I will look ugly in those photos. But today he took a nice photo of me. I like it so much. Any way, thanks ya~

07/06/2011

Today, my design fundamental lecturer distributed the MANDALA that we did on last week. I was thinking that I did it badly, I have no idea when come to this. She divided the artwork into 2 groups. One is for 'considered good' and one is for 'normal'. For those 'considered good' artwork, she said she would just show every one, as for the normal one, she would talk to each and every one one-by-one. I was hoping that I'm not the only one who would be going to enter the 2nd group.

So, she started from good ones. Suddenly I heard my name, Irene. OMG! Is it mine? I thought I did it badly. And it is grouped under 'considered good' LOL. I can't believe it...

This is the one~

Tonight, 2 rows of shops out of electricity. Then the mamak stall set candle for us. So I had a so-called 'romantic' dinner but actually damn warm. Any way, enjoy eating with my friends.

My dinner~><

My new stuff

Look! Is it looks messy? Just back 'home' after the 3days not staying at home but with many stuff kept on entering my house. From Thursday, I kept on bringing stuff back to 'home'. From my own home at Ipoh by my dear mom, and some from Wee Nee. And until today then only I have time to tidy up these things here.

First of all, these are the things brought by my mom from Ipoh.

HP printer, luckily it isn't heavy.
2 'bottles' of colour pencils.

Colour mixing tray. It's been years I didn't touch this since primary school.

Glue. Why don't I buy it here, KL? Because I dw to waste money. I bought 3 bottles, nobody is using it at home, so just bring to here.

Blade that newly bought.

Poster Colour. Also being isolated for quite a long time.

Colour papers

Notes that printed out from wble.utar.edu.my

And now move on to the stuffs that given by Wee Nee.

This is one of the bag. Not P1 okay~

Gouache. She picked from house as many of her housemates are design student and they are now no more using these kinda stuff, so she took and give me.

Poster Colour again. A bit dried.

Sponge

Apron

Obviously, sketch book as it is stated.

Colour mixing board

Cutting Mat. It is stated also~

20 inch ruler

Art block bag. But I found that my art block can't fit in... Wondering.

And lastly, a tool box.

To contain something smaller.

Set square.

Brushes.

Blade and I forgot what's the pen and pencil's specified name.

But the pencil I remember is for sketching.

This is called soft brush, right?

Colour pencils and pencils. 2B,3B and etc.

What is it? Forgot... :P

8 pcs wood carving set

I dk what is it used for.

A towel. Wee Nee said it is better to use diapers rather than this, because it absorbs more water and faster.

What again? @@ confusing with suddenly so many stuff entered my memory.

It dried. Have to use water...

I took half an hour to arrange them nicely, but still I have no idea on how to arrange it in my small little shared room? It looks crowded right now in my room... @@